The Secret Ingredient Screams

19 year old from England with an apparent need for further distraction from life responsibilities in the form of a blog.
Metal, funnies(?), badassery, and personal stuff to be found on said blog.
Enjoy.

Apr 23



shutupaubrey:

are you a dog? no ? goodbye

(via deathbyboardgames)


thefreakyouthinkyouknow asked: Enjoying Tumblr today my friend?

Yeah man, not gonna lie some of the stuff on here at the moment is cracking me up big time haha. Yourself broski? :P


holy-dildo:

death noot

holy-dildo:

death noot

(via vilevile-scorpio)


digitalmovie:


this is me about 98 percent of the time.

digitalmovie:

this is me about 98 percent of the time.

(via joachimmurat)


gearstation:

gearstation:

my roommate and their classmates are burning & sacrificing an animal cracker to pray for their greek final to be canceled

image

WOW

(via dutchster)


ponderation:

Towards the sky by Andy58 

ponderation:

Towards the sky by Andy58 

(via weflybeyondthestars)


hybridthry:

wearing all black today to mourn the death of my motivation

(via beauty-at-matrix)


plasticbagvevo:

plasticbagvevo:

lady gaga? why not gentleman gaga? end racism now!

image

(via dutchster)


Apr 22
viventomortus:

pootis bUrds

viventomortus:

pootis bUrds

(via tensualsexion)


rattle-in-piece:

So stand up and be counted
In the solar glance in the desert sand
No longer the hunted
United we are till the day we fall



a-vinlander-skald-and-bearsark:

insanefastone:

darthevzimus:

opalsoda:

crash-antebois:

dirk-the-hatter:

osheamobile:

thatoneblogyoualmostremember:

roguesareth:

myherokills:

You trip and fall to your death.

Critical fail, you swallow a knife and it explodes.

"As the assassin foolishly tries to slide down the gravelly side of the mountain, he trips and slits his throat on his knife. He’s dead. Anyone else want to do anything stupid?"

"You somehow determine that the golem is made of bacon.”

"You go to search the body, but manage instead to trigger the bear trap. I’m rolling damage now.""You shoot your unconscious bleeding cleric, roll damage. Don’t forget your favored enemy bonus."
"You fail to notice the pit in front of you as you direct your horse to walk into it."

"The mugger then proceeds to shoot his friend in the foot"

"the opponent sneezes and accidentally stabs himself to death"

"You try to pick the door, but the door picks you. You’ve been impaled."

"You let go of the bow instead of its string, and it hits you in the face before falling at your feet."me: can i just pretend like i totally meant to do that//rolls a nat 20 on a bluff check"Everyone totally saw that but it looked like you completely meant to do that."

"Right. The archer in the tree just shot himself in the foot. With a Longbow. He is now pinned to the tree with a clothyard shaft. Oh look. You’re all next."

"You teleport your friend on top of the city lighthouse… Again"
"You character does in fact know where the red-light district is - the big business part of the city where the police station is!"
"Your character does not realise that his friends’ holding their guns as walkie-talkies is a result of an airborne hallucinogenic… And instead gets sad that he didn’t get a walkie-talkie"

a-vinlander-skald-and-bearsark:

insanefastone:

darthevzimus:

opalsoda:

crash-antebois:

dirk-the-hatter:

osheamobile:

thatoneblogyoualmostremember:

roguesareth:

myherokills:

You trip and fall to your death.

Critical fail, you swallow a knife and it explodes.

"As the assassin foolishly tries to slide down the gravelly side of the mountain, he trips and slits his throat on his knife. He’s dead. Anyone else want to do anything stupid?"

"You somehow determine that the golem is made of bacon.”

"You go to search the body, but manage instead to trigger the bear trap. I’m rolling damage now."

"You shoot your unconscious bleeding cleric, roll damage. Don’t forget your favored enemy bonus."

"You fail to notice the pit in front of you as you direct your horse to walk into it."

"The mugger then proceeds to shoot his friend in the foot"

"the opponent sneezes and accidentally stabs himself to death"

"You try to pick the door, but the door picks you. You’ve been impaled."

"You let go of the bow instead of its string, and it hits you in the face before falling at your feet."
me: can i just pretend like i totally meant to do that
//rolls a nat 20 on a bluff check
"Everyone totally saw that but it looked like you completely meant to do that."

"Right. The archer in the tree just shot himself in the foot. With a Longbow. He is now pinned to the tree with a clothyard shaft. Oh look. You’re all next."

"You teleport your friend on top of the city lighthouse… Again"

"You character does in fact know where the red-light district is - the big business part of the city where the police station is!"

"Your character does not realise that his friends’ holding their guns as walkie-talkies is a result of an airborne hallucinogenic… And instead gets sad that he didn’t get a walkie-talkie"

(via theblack-swordhand)


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